Why Do We Stop Opening Up After A Certain Age?

Just got off w a wonderful guy Evo, from Dubai, @project.decade. As is typically the case when you get to know someone in this space, you share stories (often your battle stories), back & forth, & share some vulnerability.

Evo & I were introduced thru our mutual friend, @evschwa who heads up @belouga__ the online curriculum org that’s been running a super fun #SameHere campaign on Twitter w teachers from arnd the world.

Evo himself’s a teacher. He loves to design…drawings, brands, concepts, etc.  He’s one of the teachers involved in this campaign. He said some incredible things to me that really made me think differently abt big topics – some things I figured would be helpful to share & see if they resonated w you all.

We began talking & he gave me the floor, & as most of my friends know, that might be a bad move 😂, cause now you’re stuck listening to me.  But Evo took it all in, listened…& here’s what he shared back:

“Thank you for sharing so openly abt your experience w someone you hadn’t known before this call. I often think abt myself & why we as adults don’t share as openly as often, & I think a big part of it is – we’ve been wounded before. We’ve been lied to before. We’ve been broken before, or taken advantage of when we HAVE been vulnerable.”

This hit me like a ton of bricks for a # of reasons. 1) Since I came out of my hellish period I’ve been an open book…bc sharing feels good to me, let’s me help others, & compared to the hell period, being open feels easy. 2) Going back to this pic & appearance at a school of 2nd – 5th graders, who were jumping up to share anything/everything abt themselves, I always deferred to the MAIN reason why ppl stop sharing – is they get to be a teenager-ish age, start to develop ego, compare/contrast, & no longer want to open up as easily, fearful of not fitting in.

To me, it was always the age/ego & comparison/judgement thing. What Evo shared is – a big piece is growing older & HAVING shared before, but having had it come back to bite you, bc ppl can be vindictive, mean spirited, & use things against you. Important take on why so many still find it hard to share!

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