Why We Can’t Take Everything Personally

I know this is a weird question to ask, but you’ll see where I’m going w it. Yes, that’s me as a toddler, w food all over my face, likely as my mom was yelling at me to get in the car & close the door.  The car? If I remember correctly it was an “Oldsmobile 88.” My mom loved that car bc it was roomy.


My parents have never been “car people.” The first “new” car my dad ever purchased, was a Hyundai Excel hatchback, before Hyundai was attempting to make cars that looked even remotely drivable. His model was silver, & best resembled a tuna can. I remember the basically model didn’t come w floor mats.


We were probably the last fam on the block to get a car that had both power windows & locks. By no means were we deprived. That’s just how my parents were (& now are) – cars & their amenities don’t matter much to them.


So, I was pleasantly surprised this wknd when my dad traded in his old lease, & a new car was sitting in his driveway when I cam over. A brand new, silver, Toyota Camry. Now I get for most, that doesn’t scream luxury, but for my parents, this was a big deal. And I gotta even admit, the car kinda looked sporty & nice. I’m actually shocked my parents didn’t go w the maroon color they’ve liked on other cars so much.


I, as have my brothers, often told my parents, that when we make enough, we want to buy them a really nice, luxury car, bc they’ve never had one.  And they always say the same thing: save your money, we like simple things, especially when it comes to cars.


Take that sentiment, & extrapolate it out to car shopping & the question above – what if cars had emotions? If they did, my parents could be taken to dealerships like Aston Martins, Maseratis, Porches, Lamborghinis, w a blank check, & they would offend all these cars, passing them by, despite their beauty, as they ask to be taken to a Honda dealership, instead.


So what’s my point in all of this.  As kids, we want acceptance. I remember going out in the city for the first time w fake ID’s & trying to meet girls in our upper teens, just before college, & being crushed at the first rejection – assuming it was a signal of the “luck” (or lack thereof) I’d have for the rest of the night – maybe my look was off 😂


But as you get older, you realize, the world doesn’t work that way. Everyone has different tastes. This goes not just for cars & for ppl we hope to date. It goes for employers seeking candidates. It goes for coaches looking for players, etc.


Everyone has different tastes. Any while yes, there may be some form of universality that Brad Pitt & Megan Fox are both beautiful humans, there are some ppl out there who actually don’t find them so attractive.


This is why we have to try our best when things don’t go our way.  When we don’t get the job we thought we were a shoe-in for (maybe the hiring manager just had weird taste), when we are rejected by a significant other we wish had the same feelings for us (maybe they liked guys w red hair), or when a coach sees something in another player they didn’t see in us (maybe speed was more important than power to his lineup).


It’s cliche to say beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but it is. Everyone has different tastes, different desires, different things they place importance on. We just need to find the ppl & groups & things where we fit. Sometimes, that takes time. But the belonging is worth the time put in to find the right fit. Remember, even Ferraris get rejected. That doesn’t mean they aren’t amazingly awesome, beautiful cars!

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