When sharing the story abt the ER doc we tragically lost to suicide, many chimed in w msgs of support for the fam, for other docs, for anyone facing any type of suicidal thoughts.
Then someone chimed in w this quote, essentially explaining why what this poor doc did, was wrong: .“Almost all problems are temporary. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem that hurts the victim’s friends & family.”
I just put up a poll on this, & this post may sway votes, but I gotta say it. I gotta say it in defense of that doc, the 1 mill we lose to suicide annually, their fam & friends. I gotta say it to all those who’ve struggled w ideations/attempts: The above quote is just flat out unfair & wrong. It’s also hurtful. I’m not sharing this opinion to upset anyone who feels the opposite. I respect the opinions of others. But, I do believe we have an education gap in this space as to the “what” that CAN happen, when ideations take over.
Suicide often times is NOT a result of “A” happening to someone so they “think hard about it” & “choose” not to live. This is why we’ve gone away from “commits suicide” & toward “died by suicide” as we better understand what happens.
My experiences was more related to the stresses/traumas seen in life that accumulate & build over time. Just like a leg can break from pressure, I believe a brain, in the proverbial sense, can break. When I felt my ideations, nothing bad, situationally, had happened in my life in the previous few months. It was an accumulation of a lot of stuff, over time, & it was the last piece “taken out of my Jenga tower” & I toppled over.
Are there ppl who contemplate suicide, situationally, bc of a specific “thing” that happened? Sure. But I’m more of the belief that many/most cases – it’s a system overload/break; one that sends our thoughts to an irrational place of self harm. It’s an irrational place that many can’t fathom, when feeling healthy. But that irrational place overwhelms our thoughts & acts like a magnet towards self harm. How can we blame someone given how the thoughts take over? We need to educate, what to do when the thoughts arise – not blame.