We’ve all been there – we go to the gym for the 1st time in a while…or over-exert ourselves in some form of physical activity (helping a friend move, etc.), & we’re absolutely spent the nxt day.
And when this happens, we don’t ever question it. We just did something we were out of practice from…& it took the life out of us.
When it comes to our MH, if you’ve been thru trauma (& the hypothesis here is, if you’re human, ya likely have), you know what it’s like to have at least some of your feelings/emotions “put on a shelf.”
Lots of theories why: but amongst the best/clearest I buy into – trauma disrupts our neural circuitry.
So we work (often) to rewire back: meditation, journaling, yoga, mindfulness, breathing…to get some access to that which we’ve lost a bit (or a lot) of, from the difficult experiences.
So when we do start to rewire, & gain back access to those feelings which we haven’t had in some time – it CAN exhaust us.
This has happened to me recently: time spent w fam/loving on my niece…mtg someone I connect w out for dinner…getting w friends I haven’t seen in some time bc of the sh*t show of the past yr+… & in the moment, I’m pleasantly surprised, that I’m able to actually “enjoy”…to feel…to emote. Then I wake up the nxt day & I’m SPENT. Look & act like this cute dog (tho maybe not as cute).
And when this happens, I get down on myself: why work so hard on the rewiring exercises, daily, if when I get back access to what I’ve been missing, it seems to send me into exhaustion??
But then I remember the physical example. We accept that (after being out of practice), we struggle at first, when getting back into activity…until we build up some routine & stamina.
So why wouldn’t we EXPECT to feel spent when we’re out of practice, getting back emotions?? The diff here is – we think it’s a step “back” after just having had a “good” day before, w our emotions.
The exhaustion should be expected. Many of us are out of practice even just seeing friends & connecting, bc of the past yr+. Be OK, that it’s a process. The exhaustion’s to be expected. Let it be & keep at the work. It’s worth it. WE are worth it.