7/5/21: We Can Always Look Forward To Our Firsts

So…yesterday was July 4th.

I’ve had a history w the 4th, that goes all the way back to being a kid, 9yrs old. Like many who grew up in the northeast, I started going to sleep-away camps that age. There was a breakdown of the “girls side” of camp, & the “boys side.” Fraternization wasn’t exactly encouraged…even as 9 became 12yrs old – a rule most camps still uphold.

There were however rare occasions we’d all meet up- some of the larger events like a magician or performer coming for a special nt, or a holiday wknd, like a July 4th.

In the 80s/90s, it was all the cheesy stuff: red, white & blue icicles, streamers, & then a fireworks show down by the “waterfront,” as most camps were set on lakes. They’d sit us nxt to our friends in our bunks, to watch the fireworks. Tho the boys & girls sides were in the same area, there was def no crossover allowed.

Thinking back to then, I had “a girlfriend” various summers (what a boyfriend/girlfriend even meant at 9-12yrs old is pretty innocently hilarious). And, I remember thinking, even then, it’d be cool to sit w my girlfriend to watch these lights in the sky…but- counselors watched us like hawks.

Fast fwd now many yrs later, I don’t know if this holiday just has it out for me, but tho I’ve had significant others for stretches, I’ve NEVER been physically w one of them, to watch a fireworks display. After all these yrs?

In college, summers I was often off working somewhere out of state. Early in my career, I was in other markets w events I had to work. My good fam friend’s bday was on 7/4 & on some free ones we’d go see him. My grandmother lives for fireworks & I’d sometimes go just to see her happy for a nt. Then…other times I was just in long distance relationships that made being together logistically challenging.

In my life I’ve never experienced sitting/laying on a blanket, or out on a dock or a boat, just watching fireworks w someone I care deeply abt.

So it got me thinking last nt: I could lament what I haven’t had, that I do eventually want, or I could be psyched that after all these yrs, the 1st time will be amazing! WE get to choose the perspective.

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