How often do we hear cliches contradicting this advice: “you can’t pour from an empty cup”….” put your own oxygen mask on first”…”self-care isn’t selfish.”
There’s certainly validity to each of these & so I’m not saying they’re wrong in any way. However, in this space, we often make broad sweeping statements, w/o considering the balance we may need to find.
Whether it’s a fam member, best friend, neighbor, or stranger, there’s a bottom line here: “Helping is healing.” Though that might be a cliche in & of itself, I can’t say I’ve encountered too many instances where this isn’t the case- even when we’re in the throes of our own spirals.
When you put your own story out there in a public way, others are able to find strength & comfort in you. That feels GOOD. It makes you feel purpose. It helps you know that your own struggles may’ve happened for a reason- so that you can help others navigate their own struggles. And even if you only share w one person…your story may be the life preserver they need to stay above water till they’re able to swim to shore.
Though all the things we preach abt yoga, meditation, mindfulness, tapping, aromatherapy are so impt, & are becoming more “normalized” as part of self-care routines, so too should helping others. Can’t tell you how often, when I offer to help someone who writes in on a DM, I get “But aren’t you busy? I won’t take up too much of your time.” Here’s the thing- YOU help ME by asking. YOU help OTHERS by asking.
As humans, we crave purpose. Connecting the dots for others & helping them, actually helps us on our own healing journeys. Is there a balance that we need to strike? Of course. Empaths have to learn not to hold the weight of everyone else’s problems in a cumulative way, on their own shoulders. Those who love “puzzles,” must be careful not to dive so much into the struggles of others, that they neglect working on their own “stuff” bc of the interesting distraction helping others can be.
All this said, I’m a firm believer in building in periods of time in your day/wk, specifically to help others, just like you would time for yourself. Helping is part of our self-care.
