Sometimes you come across the right post just at the right time for how you feel. That happened last nt. This one!
I shared that I went to go watch my old school – Cornell, play hockey against BU at Madison Square Garden, in Stories. A tradition now: little nostalgia during a time when we’re supposed to be thinking abt anything but work/the daily grind.
I’ve gone to this game 5 yrs running. Joined 2 diff sets of friends from college the first 2 yrs, then the same friend, Craig, the last 3.
College may seem forever ago, but one of the reasons why many describe it as some of the best (if not the best) 4 yrs of your life is: you’re surrounded by friends 24/7.
Breakfast? Got a crew w you. First class of the day? Walk w some of your classmates. Gym? Get your crew together as if it’s a field trip. Dinner? Might be all in front of the TV, but it’s together. Out at night? Pre-party together & then out till all hours, at your favorite spot(s).
And then, after college, you become an adult.
The flip of the switch doesn’t happen right away…but there are stages. Some friends move in w significant others, & then get married & have kids early. Some friends bury themselves in their work & ambition. Some move arnd the country in pursuit of career.
And in the process, what you had in college, surrounded by what felt like a crowd, dwindles.
Last nt being w Craig & his 9 yr old son was awesome…but it was just “us.” I realized, if I didn’t go w Craig…he’d have gone alone w his son. No one else from school had reached out to him.
I texted my friends from the first 2 yrs of games to see if they’d made it. One was out of town w their in-laws, one was driving his daughter back & forth to a party.
Compared to when we were “younger,” being an adult can be lonely. Groups of friends have their own things going on. It’s not that they don’t WANT to get together…it’s that they have their own stuff to attend to.
Hope this helps those feelings lonely. I feel like I’ve been so lucky, w so many great friends over the yrs. But I too feel lonely at times. Just remember – it’s not like everyone else is partying as a group & leaving you out.