It’s only taken me 40ish yrs to come to this conclusion…but it’s real.
Have shared a lot in the last few weeks about how our pasts are now surfacing more than ever, without our distractions like sports, restaurants, shows, concerts, bar visits, to take up our time.
What I’ve noticed in myself is – my DREAMS, which I rarely ever remember, have become vivid, & I’ve woken up in sweats, w anxiety, realizing there are still fears from childhood I haven’t worked through.
Now keep in mind this is coming from someone who is trying to work, every day, on self-care & doing releasing & rewiring practices. So if it’s surfacing for me, my guess is it’s surfacing for some/many of you as well.
For me – so you can have an example of what this looks like, many of my fear-based thoughts come from the “what if” scenarios I faced as a child. My brother was sick for so long that I wondered – what if something happens to him? It then extended to other family members like – what if I tragically lose them? I kid you not – I used to follow my little brother around when he was tiny, afraid he’d walk off bc that’s what little kids do, & we wouldn’t be able to find him.
Now, here I am, older, fortunate to have these ppl in my life still. Yet, those fears & what-if scenarios from childhood still haunt me. Instead of celebrating the perseverance & the fortune of solid health, my mind still remembers the pain.
I’ve got a lot of work to do – EMDR is calling my name, @theofleury14. But the good thing is, I can now identify these things & put in a plan of action to work on them.
If stuff from your past is coming up, & they’re things that never actually happened, & they’re still traumatic, please know you’re not alone!