Today’s #SameHere Hero: Makayla Donoghue is only a freshman in college. I’m in awe of her strength.
Her story is about growing up w abusive parents – who got pregnant w her at an extremely young age, wed bc of the early pregnancy, & projected their own family issue & lack of maturity on her. What’s amazing is how Makayla is studying Social Work bc she wants to be “like a parent” to as many kids who need it, as she can, in ways she feels she never had. Please help us welcoming this budding superstar, sharing so bravely at such a young age, Makayla:
“Growing up as a young kid, I had what most from the outside would consider a ‘decent life.’ I had a home, two parents, even a dog.
But, it was what went on behind closed doors, that brought me to suffer from PTSD depression & anxiety.
My parents had me at a young age, & they certainly were not ready to be parents. Of course my early arrival resulted in them getting married. Their marriage was unhealthy. I witnessed fighting, name calling, & much more as a kid & I was scared all of the time. When I turned seven, my mom was prescribed Xanax for her depression & anxiety, & she became addicted. Both of my parents came from broken homes. My mom struggled with her stuff, & my dad struggled with anger.
My moms pill addiction turned into a heroin addiction really fast, & soon enough I was living with just my dad. Working every day, all day, to keep our home, I was often alone. When I did see my mom, she had me in drug houses, on the streets with her, & she was always high. I was embarrassed, scared, hopeless, & depressed. One day, my mother attempted suicide right in front of me & the images still play back in my head. Luckily, I called the police & she was was saved in time, but the trauma didn’t stop there.
My mom’s addiction grew & grew, & she began to care more about the drugs than anything. My mom didn’t ask to see me anymore, she didn’t call – honestly she was not her anymore. I spent a lot of time alone, going without guidance & love that kids need. When I was in middle school, my mom robbed local homes & it was all over the news. Instantly, parents from my school were sharing the article on facebook, making nasty comments. People stopped inviting me places, & I hit the darkest time of my life. I felt like a reject. I felt labeled, lost, & alone. I certainly did act differently from others from what I’d been through. I wasn’t always drawn to what was popular to wear, or who was popular to hang out with, because I felt like I was different, & for that I was bullied.
As I got in HS, I met a boyfriend who I shared this darkness with. We had a long relationship, & I grew to have an unhealthy reliance on him. I based my worth on what he said. i wanted his approval. He smoked weed & partied, which of course from my childhood experiences, I didn’t like. Eventually, he broke up with me & told me he couldn’t take how ‘messed up in the head I was from my mom’ & how he lost feelings because I had ‘family problems he couldn’t even fathom.’
That’s when the bullying began, again. Him & his friends called me the literal sense of crazy, a crack baby, & more. Of course them being all-star athletes who everyone knew, didn’t help. I became suicidal. I felt like I had no purpose in this world & like things were always going to be this way. I was down to 90 pounds, being 5’4” & I finally sought help – psychotherapy, church, lots of reading.
My father never took me to the doctors as a kid because he felt like the same thing that happened to my mom would happen to me. I also really struggled with self worth because my father has major anger issues, & was very mentally abusive. Something as simple as a dish in the sink would get me screamed at in my face, called names, & he would tell me I’m worthless just like my mom. I even got physically abused.
Now i am now a freshman in college & they still do make fun of me. If i post a picture of me wearing something they don’t like, I see its being sent around in group chats, I get texts from them, & more.
I am now majoring in social work at the University of Kentucky living in a healthier environment with my grandma, struggling to make the life i want for myself & beating the odds stacked against me. It is my goal in social work to be who i needed as a kid & use my #SameHere Story to help others realize their worth & that they’re not alone. I cant stand to see even one more life taken over mental health.”