I’ve been fortunate enough to be in a lot of “rooms” in my life. I don’t mean rooms in the traditional sense – “these 4 walls.” I mean in the sense of getting to know diff groups of friends, family, colleagues, neighbors, collaborators.
By 26 I hadn’t ever left NY full-time. Grew up here, went to college upstate, worked for the NBA League Office (stationed in NYC) those first 4-5 yrs out of school.
Still, even in maintaining NY as mostly home base, I was never one for having a single group of friends…or a click w a single grp as work. And even at work w the NBA, a lot of it was on the road, meeting in actual diff “rooms” w the 30 diff teams/players/executive staff.
Then I finally made the jump outside of NY…the career jump to work on the team side, w stints in Chicago, Phoenix/Scottsdale, NJ, South Florida. And along with those trips, the diff “rooms” involved meeting diff groups of friends, colleagues, neighbors, once again.
So why give that bkgrnd? Bc when you’re fortunate enough to live, or work w, or get to know so many diff groups of ppl in so many diff parts of the country/world, you start to notice patterns.
There are so many talented ppl. So many gifted ppl. So many intelligent ppl. There are definitely some “challenging” ppl as well :). But here’s the underlying takeaway for me: w all the ppl I’ve met & become friends or acquaintances w, the ppl you want to surround yourself w, in terms of staying in touch, giving THEM the most time, being there for each other: it’s the ones who’d shout your name in a room, any time there was an opportunity for you.
That may say like an obvious statement, but it’s not. There are commonalities in the groups in the rooms I’ve been in. Especially amongst guys, everyone gives each other sh*t in a fun way…everyone has a competitive side…everyone shares what’s been working for them to some degree or level.
But here’s a big difference: the rooms you want to stay in the most, are the ones where – when the folks in there hear something (that you don’t) that can help you: instead of not telling you – out of anger, jealously, not wanting to fall behind they jump at the opportunity to tell you, Bc they love you, & your success is THEIR success. This pic is of me & some of my best friends from college. Still some of my best friends bc even tho we rip on each other, we are there for each other & we look out for each other. I recognize I’m fortunate to have a number of groups like that. But my rallying cry is, evaluate who you spend time w. Sadly there are some ppl I’ve had to cut out of my life – ppl who were fun, outgoing, intelligent, creative. But deep down, they wouldn’t “call out my name.” You deserve to be surrounded by ppl who would…bc you know you’d do it for others you love. Hope that dividing line helps you on your path. It’s helped me!
