Shared a post the other day on why so many avoid pain…& as a result, project their pain on others. A protection mechanism.
So much of my individual healing from past wounds has come from exercises where I don’t need to lean – as much – cognitively/emotionally, into the pain. That’s not bc of avoidance. It’s bc of what I’ve learned abt self-healing & how actual structures in the body need the healing.
Whether it’s a TRE where I can shake/tremor out trauma…a BrainSpotting that helps open files in my brain properly close…a breathing practice that heals my affected vagal nerve tone…or Tapping on meridian points that opens up clogged energy highways…I’m fortunate I’ve learned these STARR (stress & trauma active release & rewiring) tools, that enable me to do a lot of work, on my own, in a very body-based way.
Don’t get me wrong – when done properly, even tho they aren’t top of mind at first, doing these exercises can bring UP a past event or emotion that’s painful (even surprisingly):
I was doing a breathing practice the other day, & out of nowhere I remembered my 1st dentist office visit I ever made w my parents as a little kid – the waiting room, the color of the chair in the office. Right now, I don’t remember ever fearing dentists, but as a kid…that must’ve been something I held on to. Still, most of the body-based work isn’t that painful to do, emotionally.
While not a huge fan of traditional talk therapy, I recognize its place – especially in interpersonal relationships – to have a mediator to help you talk more openly.
W/o divulging too much, I’ve been working w others close to me, in that type of therapy environment. And let me say this – even WHEN the therapist has your back & talks abt a painful wound from the past that someone else may not have known/acknowledged to that pt, the rehashing OF that event/wound can be so painful. You forget how much it NOT being addressed hurt you…& you don’t realize it till it’s discussed openly. Then, it takes a bit, even when there’s acknowledgment from all parties that it happened, for the wound to heal properly.
Healing can be painful. But the work is worth it.
