What past life experiences, physical traumas or genetics do you believe have had an effect on your mental health?

I was teased in the third grade for being a black kid that “talked and acted white.”

I had zero sense of fashion and was also teased for the way I dressed and the clothes I couldn’t afford.

I was a nice guy and was constantly scared of being jumped. I never felt safe in my neighborhood.

I had an emotionally absent father.

I had deep feelings of loneliness and depression but had been taught that “Real Men Don’t Cry.”

I’ve been diagnosed with clinical depression and still take anti-depressants to balance the chemicals in my brain.

I had an opioid addiction that I developed from prescriptions I received after a back surgery that ended my athletic career.

I was hustled by pastors I trusted for money.

How did the effects on your mental health appear in terms of symptoms?

These events made me feel like I didn’t matter. I felt like no one actually cared about me as a person. I felt like people only cared about my athletic skills or leadership ability.

I felt like I would always be alone and never be fulfilled by work or relationships.

I felt super average and that my life didn’t really matter.

When and why did you decide to ask for help to get relief?

I never looked or truly even asked for help. I just turned to drugs, sex and partying to avoid dealing with my emotional pain.

It lead me down a deeper path of depression and resulted in multiple suicide attempts.

What methods helped you individually get/feel better?

So many!

Here are my favorites:
1. Prayer
2. Talking to my wife, peers and mentors
3. Journaling to process my emotions
4. Creating something. I prefer to write music, poetry or blog posts.
5. My Emotional Emergency file filled with dreams, victory moments in my life, songs, funny videos etc.

Why did you decide to go public with your story? Who were/are you hoping to help and how?

I decided to share my story when I survived suicide, got hope and wanted to share that same hope with others.

I help anyone who feels depressed find hope.
I help any athlete that feels alone, find camaraderie.
I help mission-centered speakers build innovative six-figure speaking careers.

How did people react when you went public with your story?

When people hear my story they feel inspired and motivated to keep pressing on towards their future.

They feel equipped with practical tools to build their dreams.

They no longer feel alone.